Working Towards Our Purpose

Welcome Back to episode 53 of Working Towards Our

Purpose. Thanks for being here as always.

And yeah, just again, trying to do a little check in before we start

the episode. Seeing how you're feeling. Seeing how I'm feeling.

Feeling. Okay. This morning had kind of a interesting stir. I had a.

One of those credit card like notifications that

like I made a purchase because I have those turned on come through

like overnight. So I woke up to a credit

card charge that I didn't make. And I think that always kind of

instills like anxiety of like somebody stealing your

identity or whatever. But it was weird because it came from a place that

like I do purchase stuff at, but I just wasn't there yesterday

or in the middle of the night. So it kind of

threw off my morning because I looked at my phone and I have

most notifications turned off, but that was on. So that kind of like

bothered me, I guess. And like I started worrying about it and then I was

like, well, there's nothing you can do until the processing goes through anyways.

So I was able to kind of reframe it and be like, you know, let's

worry about it tomorrow whenever the processing is done, if it even goes through.

So yeah, anyways, was. Was a little off balance I guess this morning,

but I went for my run as I normally do before these episodes. And then

it kind of came. Brought a little clarity about like what I wanted to

talk about today. And I'm gonna try something a little different

for this episode and for the

next episode. On Friday I'm gonna do a

sort of two part series where this will be the first part and

Friday will be the second part. So the, the

topic that I want to talk about is how to make right decisions

for you, like how to make better decisions for you.

I think indecision is something that certainly

plagues me, has in the past. I think a lot of people struggle with making

decisions. Especially nowadays when there's like so many options

and you go to a grocery store and there's 15 different types

of butter that you could buy, or people

all day long yelling at you on social media to do this or to do

this. It becomes hard to think about what you should

do for yourself. At least it is for me.

So I think I was kind of thinking back on how

when I was really desperate to get out of my corporate job, I decided

that I needed to start a side business and I was

trying to figure out like what to do and I was just like really

kind of unsure of what to do. I didn't really look

at, like, all of my options or, like, thinking about starting something new.

I think I really just sort of acted based off of,

like, oh, well, I know how to do audio engineering, so it has to be

in that realm. And then it has to be podcasting, because

that's, you know, easier than doing, like, full music production. So.

So that was the side business that I started when I was still in my

corporate job, you know, editing other people's podcasts.

So it was a decision that

was the best for me at the time and the best I could make, and

I don't regret it or anything. But thinking about, like, you know, if somebody is

in a similar position, how do you make. How do you make a better decision?

Or how. How do you make a better decision for you? Um,

so in. In today's episode, I do want to talk about the first part.

Um, so. So basically this episode and next episode,

there'll be, like, two big things that you can do to help you make

better decisions for yourself. And. And then we'll break those

down. So. So in today's episode, I want to talk about balancing your

nervous system as a way to help you make better

decisions. Um, so what do I mean by

balancing your nervous system if you've never heard of that or maybe you have?

Um, it's. I. I'm by no means like, an

expert in. Probably not the best person to be answering this

question, but I will describe what it means from my

perspective, so hopefully it'll be relatable to you. Um, I. I think in the

past, I always had

some sort of unregulated nervous system, but didn't really know what it meant. And

I guess sort of what it feels like is maybe

you're preoccupied or you're anxious about something. Um,

it sort of feels like you have to rush to get things done. Maybe

you feel uneasy, unsettled. Um,

I. I think that now that

I'm trying to think about it, it is becoming harder than I thought.

Um, but I. I guess. I guess one. One sort

of word that always comes up to mind is, like, sense of urgency. That sort

of always unsettles me. Like, I know in my corporate job there would always be,

like, somebody wanting to get somebody that wanted you to

do something. And it was always, like, last minute. It always

needed to be done right now. And that always, like, put me,

like, uneasy. I was like, I had an anxious feeling of, like,

I can't rest until this thing is done. You know, I'm

not allowed to take a breath until this thing is done. Just that, like that

really being tense, like literally

physically like your, your shoulders are up by your ears. Like

I remember many times of being in my corporate

job working on my computer and then just like realizing how like

squeezed tight my shoulders were, like up, literally up

towards my ears. And then I would like finally, I didn't even

know how long I was like, felt like that. But then I noticed

it and I was able to like put them down and, and then five minutes

later they're like right back up towards my ears. Um, so, so that's kind of

what I'm talking about. Like the, the sort of uneasiness.

Um, definitely the opposite of

feeling at peace or at ease. Um, so

why I think that this is important when making

decisions is because I think when your nervous system

is not balanced, when it's, when it's out of balance and

you're sort of anxious, I think you end up making

poor decisions. And I think it brings

up like one, one story that,

that I have from like when I was younger. And I think it's a good

example. So I remember one time I

always used to work, work in the garage with my dad. He, he was

very like hands on, worked on cars and lawnmowers and,

and all that kind of stuff. Was always tinkering with something and I was

messing with something. I can't remember what it was, but like I was, I was

trying to fix something. I think it was like on a lawnmower or something. It

doesn't matter. But I remember I was like

working on some like taking a bolt off or something. And

I like, I hit my knuckle.

Like the wrench slipped and it like hit my knuckle. And then it made me

mad. And then I started like just like

wrenching at it even harder. And like, because I was

angry, I was like putting like anger towards it. And then I

ended up, I think my dad said something to me. I can't remember if he

said it before or after, but he said something like, like calm down.

Like it's not, you're not gonna do any good by being upset at it. And

then I ended up like stripping the bowl. And then I was even more mad

because it was like now I just turned a five second

task into like a who knows how long task. And

he said something like, that's what happens when like you get

upset or something. So I think that's like a really

good physical representation of how like,

you know, being your nervous system, being unbalanced can help you make

Poor decisions, because I was, like, already heightened

and angry that, like, I just smashed my knuckle. I then

put the anger into, like, doing the task and worked too fast at

it. I didn't take a second to, like, look what I was doing. I could

have put some, like. Like anti rust spray or whatever

on the bolt, waited a minute, and maybe it would have been loose, and I

could have just taken it out nice and easy. But instead, I got angry and

I made a poor decision. And, yeah, it kind of, like,

compounds your poor decisions. You make one, it doesn't turn out the way you want,

and you're like, oh, I have to hurry up. I got to finish this. I

have to keep moving forward. And then you end up making

another board decision. So I think that's a good representation of, like,

other areas of your life when you're making decisions and

thinking about, like, how can you settle yourself

before you make a decision? Because everybody's always trying to get an answer out of

you. Everybody's trying to get you to make a decision, like, you know, something

as simple as, like, somebody texting you and being like, hey, you want to hang

out on Friday? Like, I don't know how you. If this

resonates with you, but for me, sometimes I feel like I have to answer it

right away. And. And then sometimes I feel like I have to say yes right

away. So then I'll end up saying yes, and then Friday I'll come and I'll

be like, oh, I don't really want to do this anymore. But if I took

maybe a day to get back to him, I could have checked in with myself.

I could have been like, you know what? I'm actually busy. And that's

fitting. Too many things, and I don't want to go. I'll say no. Um,

so. So when you give yourself a chance to get balance. To balance your nervous

system, I think you can make better decisions. Um,

so. So, yeah, hopefully. Hopefully that makes sense, and hopefully

some of that resonated with you. Um, so for the rest of the episode, I

want to talk about five things that you can do to balance

your nervous system. Um, so these are things that I've. I've

done in the past, things that I go to now. I

think that they've been helpful for me, so hopefully they

can be helpful for you. So the first thing that you can do

to try to balance your nervous system is. Is to literally just

slow down. Um, like I said before, I think

for whatever reason, people think everything is, like,

so urgent all the Time. And in most cases,

things are not urgent. Um, you know, especially when it

comes to work. I know that may sound

like maybe you might think that's unrealistic, but I think unless

we're like emergency room doctors or,

I don't know, something else that's like literally life sustaining, then

it's probably not as urgent as we've been

led to believe. I used to work in engineering.

You know, whatever the part is that we were making

for, you know, our customer, like, it didn't really matter

if it got done today or tomorrow. They like to make you believe

that everything is like, last minute. We should have got this done yesterday.

Um, but I think that that thought pattern is, it's just not

helpful for making decisions. Um, so I think slowing down is, is

the first thing to try to try to balance, balance yourself and to try to

make more decisions better. Um, or to try to make better decisions

not, not more. Um, but so slowing

down, what does that look like? Like, literally removing yourself from the situation.

Maybe you're at work and your boss is telling you you got to get this

thing done now, like, when's it going to be done? When's going to be done?

Literally just like going for a walk, getting up

from your desk. I like to meditate. I know

that meditating is something

that, something that some people don't like, but really,

I think taking just like 10 minutes for yourself,

whether you call it meditating or not, like go, you know, go walk

to the cafeteria and back in 10 minutes. Or, or like go

outside for a walk. Go, go lay on your couch for 10 minutes. Like,

I think meditation could look like sitting on your

couch and not looking at your phone for 10 minutes. And

you know, whatever you may think about just that, that's okay, but you're just kind

of like stepping out of it for 10 minutes and then going back in.

I think that can be really helpful to sort of balance, balance

yourself, to help help regulate your, your nervous

system. Um, and then along with that, the second thing would be to.

Again, it's very simple. These are all very simple things. But breathing,

taking three deep breaths can literally

help balance your nervous system. You can feel it in your

body. Um, if, if you're in tune with

how, how your body feels, it can feel

so much different from just taking like three full deep breaths. Holding

it at the top, holding at the bottom, just doing three deep breaths. It can

really make a huge difference. Um, so, you know,

slowing down, taking deep breath, uh, the third thing would be to, to just

move to Exercise. I, I always say how, how helpful

running is for me. Um, you know, I, like, like this morning

when waking up, I was already sort of

off balance because of this credit card charge that I didn't know where it came

from. And in reality, I can't do anything about it right now.

So, you know, I went for a run and I let it pass and I

was like, okay, there's nothing I can really do about it right now. I'll just

wait it out, see what happens and, you know, focus on other

things, focus on getting the podcast recorded, focus on what I want to say.

So exercise has always been really helpful for me. And you don't have to run

it. It can be a walk. It could be, you know, anything, really.

Biking. Um, but. But something as simply as just walking can

really help you. And there's something about, like, the forward momentum

that, like, is really helpful for your brain, I think.

Um, so. So even just like going out for a little walk, um, the

fourth thing would be community. And

what I mean by that is like, your friends or, or even just putting

yourself in public. Like, a lot of times I find myself

sort of starting to freak out about something, and usually I'm

like, alone by myself in my apartment,

and I notice there's, like, nothing around me. There's no people around me. So

sometimes, like, calling a friend, it kind of puts you back on like

a normal plane. Like, you know, you hear somebody else's voice

and they're not freaking out about something, and then you're like, okay, I'm

okay. There's nothing urgent that's going on right now. Like,

I'm gonna survive. You know, somebody can have a

conversation with you and try to, like, help you problem solve maybe, or

even just get your mind off of it. That's always really helpful.

But even if you don't have somebody specifically to call, I've always found that

literally just going out in public can help.

You know, I live in a more populated area, but,

like, even if you don't, like, go to a coffee shop and there'll be people

that you'll have to interact with, and that always kind of helps

me get on a more level base with myself.

You know, somebody just nodding to you or saying good morning or hello,

it kind of like snaps you out of the

circle cycle that you, that you put yourself in.

I've always, I've always noticed that that, like, human interact. Interaction is very helpful.

So that's, that's the fourth step is community, human interaction.

And then the last, the fifth Step would be to go out

in nature. And this is one that, like, always

works for me, but it's the hardest one for me to actually go do.

And I'm not quite sure why, but maybe because it

requires some driving, but. But

literally, just going for, like, a hike can be a complete

reset of my nervous system. I could be, you

know, really, like, down. Down in the dumps about something.

I could be really anxious about something. But going out in

nature always helps me, like, come back to myself

to realize the bigger picture and be like, okay, you know, it's. It's

one day, you know, this thing that I'm kind of worried about or freaking out

about isn't necessarily that important, or,

you know, we can fix it. There's. There's nothing that, you know, we can't really

work on or fix or do better at. And

going out for. For me

and. And I did read this somewhere too, that going by the water

like. Like by the ocean is really helpful

for balancing your nervous system. Um, I was trying to remember where

I read it. It said something like. I think it was the

tides of the ocean help to balance your

nervous system just, like, by being around it. And

I resonated with that because I've always. Anytime I've always been by the water,

it's helped me, like, sort of calm down and

sort of feel more relaxed and. And I think that

being out in nature also does the same thing. But there's

something special about, like, being by the ocean. And, you know, obviously we all can't

be by the ocean, but I do fortunately live pretty close to

the ocean. I can, you know, walk. I could run to it in a couple

miles. And. Yeah, just. Just like when I go

for my morning run, I go by the ocean. And it is

just looking out at it. I think it's the. It's like the vastness of it

kind of makes you feel small and kind of makes you feel like, okay,

you know, all these problems that I'm thinking about, they're not really as

big as nature is, as the universe

is, and it kind of just has a way of

calming you down. And. Yeah, I think

another thing that maybe if you're not by the water, looking out at the stars

always does that for me too. Just taking a moment to.

Maybe it's nighttime. And. Well, I guess hopefully it would have to be nighttime.

But looking up at night and looking up at the stars

just. I don't know, something about it makes. Makes me feel a little bit more

at peace, a little bit more at ease. Because,

yeah, you just remember, like, you're just, you know, a little speck

and, you know, maybe. Maybe the,

the $40 credit card charge that was accidentally made isn't going to be

the end of the world. Even if you end up losing $40, like, you

know, not really going to make a big difference in the grand scheme of things.

So I think your peace is more important. And, and that's kind of,

that's kind of what we're talking about, what I'm talking about with balancing

your nervous system. It's like bringing that inner peace to yourself

and trying to find that more often. And I think,

like, I never really realized the importance of that

when I was in my 9 to 5 corporate job because everything just

moved so fast and I didn't get a chance to check in

with myself and to be like, I feel like, not good right

now. Like, I need to take a second. You know, like

I always say, like, I'm a processor and it takes me time to process

things. Like, I've just kind of accepted that as

that's who I am. Like, it takes me a minute to figure out what's going

on. And it's okay to do that. It's okay to take a minute for

yourself. It's okay to slow down and to check

in with yourself and to give yourself a little bit of space to take a

breath to balance your nervous system. Like these, these are all

things that can help you not only just feel better,

but, but back to the topic of the episode to help you make better decisions

for yourself. And, you know, I

think that, like, it's just. It's just such a

crucial thing that, like, it. It took me a long time to, like,

learn that, I guess, is what I'm trying to say. Um, so. So

hopefully, hopefully that makes sense. Hopefully that's helpful for

some of you. Um, but yeah, just. Just really thinking about

balancing your nervous system and thinking about what brings you peace. And,

and these are just five things that I've done to, to balance my nervous system.

So, you know, let. Let me know if, if there's something out there that,

that you found that can help you balance your nervous system. And we're all different.

And, you know, I don't expect all these five to work for you, but try

them out and, and see. See what happens. Or, like I said, let me

know, Let me know which ones work for you or which

new ones work for you that I haven't mentioned. So, yeah,

all about making better decisions for ourselves so we can find a little bit more

peace and happiness with ourselves. And yeah, I think that that's really

important. And that's all I got for you for this

episode for today about making better decisions for

yourself and balancing your nervous system. And in Friday's

episode, I will have part two of how to make better decisions

for yourself. And we'll have one more big thing that I

think can help you make better decisions. So thanks for listening, as

always. Thank you for watching if you're on YouTube, and I will

see you on another episode real soon. Thank you.

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